...A Day in the Life...

5:50-6:30am - B's alarm goes off. Repeatedly. Until I turn it off because he never, ever hears it. I prod and poke him and whine about the alarm until he finally rouses and heads downstairs to start his day. I also threaten him within an inch of his life if he wakes Baby B as he passes through his nursery on his way to the stairs.

6:30am - Offer up a small prayer that Baby B sleeps for another 20-30 minutes.

6:32am - Prayer failed. Baby B is up. And so am I.

6:32am-7:00am - Nurse, diaper change, pull out toys and play on the floor while watching the local news. Prevent Baby B from entering the bathroom while daddy gets ready.

7:00am - Watch opening credits for The Today Show, note interest in Meredith's power suit, Anne's feature story on the Octo-mom, Matt and Al's latest adventure, and covet Natalie's hair. Kiss husband goodbye, admire Baby B staring out the window, waving, as daddy speeds away.

7:00-8:00am - Straighten up first floor while Baby B plays. Start coffee. Gather laundry. Fix coffee and a sippy of milk for Baby B. Step on blocks that are strewn across the entire rug. Put blocks away. Baby B dumps blocks again, within minutes of me picking them up. Build a couple block of castles that usually last .2 seconds before Baby B's open hand sends them tumbling down. Baby B loses interest in blocks and now is eyeing my cell phone sitting at toddler eye-level on the sofa.

8:00am - Kashi Strawberry Waffles in the toaster, slice peaches (or banana), scoop up Baby B and wrestle place him gently into his highchair. Listen as he babbles wildly about how slow the whole toaster process is. Present him with sippy of milk which he immediately chucks on the floor. Baby B eats (remember this process?) and I read an article or two of Parent's magazine, or check out blog updates. Drink another cup of coffee.

8:22am - Breakfast is over, waffle is consumed, and peach and/or banana has morphed into sludge that is now serving as Baby B's latest hair product. Spiking or matting hair with said product is optional, though an option that he regularly chooses to exercise.

8:22-8:28 - Sing the Clean Up song from Barney as I approach Baby B with the dreaded washcloth. He rocks his head back and forth, enjoying the tune, until he realizes that washcloth is approaching his face. Screams loudly, drowning out song, grabbing washcloth from my hand and sends it to the floor. I wipe up some peach-banana sludge from floor while picking up washcloth, rinse, and repeat the whole process until he can safely be removed from high chair without applying goop to anything he touches.

8:28-9:00am - Clean kitchen, run dishwasher (didn't I just run it last night?!), hold Baby B while running the vacuum since it currently scares him when it's on.

9:00am - Gather Baby B, paci, and G and put all three down for three hour nap. Praise Jesus that he still takes such a brilliantly long morning snooze.

9:00am-Noon - Switch caffeine drip from coffee to Diet Coke #1. Blog. Email. Shower. Complete school work. Start laundry. Clip coupons. Take inventory of pantry and fridge. Make grocery list and check out Money Saving Mom, Centsible Sawyer, and Cincinnati Cents for notable good deals. Dry hair. Check out celeb gossip on People. Check the 11 voice mails I let pile up over the weekend. Return calls. Straighten hair. Straighten toys, while on the phone with Sallie Mae fighting about student loans. Curse the fact that I didn't obtain a degree in elementary education the first time around, and even had to resort to student loans in the first place. Call mom and complain. Blog while talking on the phone. Pay bills. Apply make-up. Pack diaper bag for afternoon excursion. Crack open Diet Coke #2. Fold laundry. Get dressed. Take out garbage. Unload dishwasher. Start macaroni and cheese on stove. Contemplate a power nap on the couch before I hear Baby B calling me upstairs.

Noon - Lunch with Sweet Precious. Macaroni and cheese everywhere. Second serving for me, while spoon-feeding yogurt to Baby B to avoid mess. Repeat clean-up process on boy child, but opt to tidy up lunch mess until he's down for another nap to maximize errand-running time.

12:30-12:40pm - Scrape macaroni and cheese off of Baby B's forhead, while wrangling him into a darling pair of overalls. Realize he's pulled half-a-dozen wipes from container while I went to fetch socks. Smother him with kisses while telling him what a little stinker he is.

12:40-2:00pm - Target. Kroger. Walmart. Or some other combination of events that will inevitably require animal cracker bribery and a juice box to compensate for the shopping cart restraint system.

2:00pm - Arrive at home. Diaper change. Down for nap #2.

2:00-4:30pm - Snack on another bowl of mac-n-cheese while cleaning up the kitchen. Begin thinking about dinner. Thaw ground beef for burritos. More laundry. Diet Coke #3. Blog. Finish any tasks not completed during first nap.

4:30pm-5:00pm - Baby B awakes. Snack of Cheez-Its and Juicy Juice. Wonder if it's nutritionally sound for Cheez-Its to be that orange. Doesn't matter anyway, since he'd rather stomp on them on the floor than actually eat them.

5:00-6:30pm - Play outside. Wait for daddy to come home. Start dinner. Play outside some more. Pace street in the wagon, watching for daddy. Relish the moment when Baby B recognizes daddy's car coming down the street. Happily hand-off sweet boy child for ten minutes worth of dinner prep.

6:30pm-6:50pm - Dinner with my boys. Recount day's events with husband. Watch Baby B grab handfuls of dinner and shove them haphazardly into his mouth, most of which falls onto his highchair tray or the floor. Decide not to care and rerun the sweeper post-dinner. Clean kitchen with B's help. Baby B toddles beneath us, extracting dirty silverware all the while. Lovely.

6:50-7:30pm - Play outside with boys. Try to convince Baby B that grass is not toxic to the tootsies as he opts for the concrete sidewalk instead.

7:30-8:00pm - Bathtime. Jammies. Nurse. Goodnight Moon, The Very Hungry Caterpillar, or Pat the Bunny, followed by some superb vocals by mommy on her night. Prayers. Kisses. Lights out. (B and I regularly rotate nighttime duties, except for the whole nursing thing of course...)

8:00-Midnight - Glass of Yellow Tail. Sit on front porch and gab with B. Visit with the neighbors on the front lawn. Straighten house. Bowl of ice cream. Blog stalk. Etc.

Midnight - Read until eyes start to shut. Bedtime.

{While I'm sure you're thrilled to read the to-the-minute details of my daily doings, I wrote this mostly because I want written proof of what my days are like. I've not done so well at keeping up the baby book. Or journaling by hand. This was an alternative. Happy Tuesday!}