Thursday, March 11, 2010

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes...

Yesterday I took Becks to visit the preschool he will be attending in the fall. Yes, preschool. I can hardly form the words to say that, as it just doesn't seem right that he will be going to school and carrying a backpack and eating lunch and having little friends and now I think I'll cry. Sniff.

Anyway, while I do consider that a big change, it is kind of a change that is rather dependent on another big change in our lives.

Stop right now. I am NOT pregnant. Another year friends, and you may see that word pop up here. But not now. Now is not the time.

So, if you've followed my blog for any length of time, you probably know that I have been fortunate enough to teach part-time for the past two school years so that I could spend more time with Beckham while bringing home a helpful (yet meager) paycheck. I have loved teaching kindergarten even more than I imagined and love all of my kiddos dearly. So, next year, I will leave my space in the beloved kindergarten hallway so that I can teach full time. And, while that may not seem like a big deal to you all, it has really been something that I have struggled with. I have always wanted to do nothing more than be a stay-at-home mom, but we have decided that the best thing for our family in terms of our future plans (i.e. Babbling Baby Numero Dos) is for me to work full-time for at least two years so that we can save some money and make my staying home from then on a full-time gig. Plus, I have to get a master's degree along the way too. Ick.

B has always been pretty supportive of whatever I have wanted to do career-wise (ummmm, he married me when I was mid-degree #2, racking up student loan debt like crazy, and knows I have a salary cap of about $60,000), so he's behind this decision. And I don't even think Babbling Baby Numero Dos has entered his mind other than to think, Yeah, I'd like Beck to have a brother some day. Which is completely fine. I'm not ready yet either, though I get little twinges when my fav bloggers are joining the club left and right. Ahem, Natalie, Mama Faith, Lindsey B, and Hollie. Just know I'm living vicariously through you all for awhile ;)
I digress.

So, starting in the fall, Becks will now stay with my sister, Chelsea, and my mother-in-law on alternating days and go to school twice a week too. It's going to be different from the halfdays he spends with both of his nanas right now, but I think a good different. I think he will really like school and I know our family will benefit from the financial aspect of me working full time (my salary will DOUBLE! yahoo!). And I'll continue to have the benefit of various breaks, a 3-month summer vacation, snow days, and holidays to spend with my boys, so I'm hoping it won't be too bad.


Any other working mamas out there who struggle with this? It's so hard!

12 comments:

Brit said...

Praying for you as you adjust to "changes". These changes will benefit your fam in the long run so hang in there girl!

The Pettijohn's said...

Abby, ALL great things for your family!!! I applaud you for being such a devoted mommy, wife, and TEACHER! so wish you could teach my Hudson Bear!

You wear that Mommy Crown, sister!

Katie said...

Abby- no kiddos here, but I struggle with "work changes" and with do we have a our first child now or wait. How did you and B know that it was time to start a family? I am curious. All of are starting families. My heart says that I am ready...my mind (checking accounts) say not yet!

best wishes for your NEW changes!

Northern Mama from the South said...

What's interesting is that I've contimplated doing half-time kindergarten for our next child if we could swing it financially. I hate having to choose 22 other kids over my own sometimes. Some schools in our area having team teaching where two teachers teach a class and alternate days. Takes team work but I know it works for some.

I know it will all work itself out and you'll be a great mama and teacher no matter what!

kara battel said...

so, i have been a stay at home mom for the past 4 years- taught a year of kindergarten- i could never stomach the idea of daycare- (just me personally) anyway, we don't live near family, or friends that could keep our kids, and that teachers paycheck wouldn't cover the cost of daycare for the TWO of them-- i still have doubts about if i should/shouldn't be working. pray, pray hard, and pray harder-- you will get the answer that you are looking for!

Aunt Ann said...

Not an easy decision for you and B. I did things a little different.. I worked full time until Kyle started school then went part time so I could be home after school. There is no right or wrong way.. just make the most of the time you have with Beck and try and give up the not important things in life.... cleaning the house, making great meals, etc.... You will do fine... you are organized, have a great support system in your family and B and you are a great Mom.

jillbarnett said...

Yikes, touch decisions! But it sounds like you guys are on that right path :) I'm not a parent so I'm probably no help but I struggle with my work decisions as well. As I near the completion of my masters and immerse myself more and more into my work...I find myself wondering what will happen if/when we do decide to start a family. It feels like it might be career suicide, which is scary (household income-wise).

Hang in there.

Nat said...

Even though I'm still childless I feel like I'm in a similar boat I can have a baby soon and keep working or wait 2 more years and get to stay at home with my babies- which choice do I make and which one will benefit our family more?! It's so hard!

My mom was a working mother my whole life and she did an amazing job raising us and I never ever knew the difference, sometimes you have to do what's best for your family even if it means not being there all the time.

Plus think of all those kiddos that are going to benefit from having an amazing teacher like you!!

Jillian said...

Oh sweetie!! It is so hard but it does get easier! I am trying to get part time right now but it is not looking good:(

The White Family said...

Of course I have an opinion on this:-) I chose to go back to work full time when paise was 4 months. However she was at school with me! After teaching kindergarten for 6 years, I encourage a pre-school experience, and I'm sure you do to! It is great academically and most important, socially! Thats why most states are trying to implement the pre-k's in the public school setting. In this economy, its a good idea to hang on to any position available to you! There are so many teachers looking for jobs right now and in my county there actually cutting positions:-( Teaching is the best job for raising a child! You have so much time with them even when your a full time teacher, you only work half the year! 180-200 days:-) It will also be pretty cool to go through school with them, if your teaching. Of course I envy those stay at home moms too! I would love to be with Paise ALL the time! But she will be heading to school before too long and as a teacher I'll will be there with her:) So don't be hard on yourself! You're a great momma! Does babbling run in the fam?

Rachie (Walker's Mom) said...

I know how tough the decision is whether to work or not. Think how wonderful it is that you were able to be at home with Becks most of the time for the first two years of his life! And not to mention the fact that you have family to watch him when he's not in preschool. You are a wonderful mommy. Becks is blessed in every way.

Hollie said...

oh friend, i struggle with this daily. i stayed home a year after having kate, then went back to work and am now hoping to stay home again with baby hamp. 'hoping' is the key word - actually, 'praying' is more like it. i feel your struggle, and have a healthy dose of mom guilt at times, too. but it sounds like you two have it all planned out to fit your needs right now, and baby #2 should be around the corner before you know it. :-)
hang in there!