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Monday, April 14, 2014

The Manic-est Monday.

I didn't really expect today to be manic at all.

It was rainy.  I had a quiet cup of coffee.  Worked a little bit.  The day was slow. 

Until it wasn't.  

Until suddenly the home health nurse was at my front door and my hair was half dry and my face only half done.  And, of course, it was at that very moment that the doorbell rang that I realized I was supposed to throw a couple of cotton balls in Faith's diaper before the home health nurse arrived so she could collect a urine sample.  


I threw the cotton balls in anyway and apologized for my forgetfulness, praying that Faith would pee sometime during the visit.  Well, sister one-upped me and did #1 and #2, thus contaminating the specimen.  At that point, I had to leave to get Becks, and was going to have to collect and drop of the specimen myself.

So, go ahead.  Ask me if I squeezed pee from cotton balls into a specimen cup in the parking lot at tae kwon do today.  

Oh, yes.  Yes, I did.


The good news?  (It has nothing to do with pee.)

Becks got his new orange belt and his gear at TKD today.  The squishiness of his cheeks in that helmet thing make my heart happy.  Bless it.  

I wish you could've seen his face when he realized the purpose of the included protective cup.  You mean this is for...oooooooh.  It was an ah-ha moment of epic proportions.  Big eyes and all.  I told him daddy would help him figure it out.  Cups, in my world, are glass and filled with ice and Diet Coke.  

Anyway, after dropping off the cup-o-pee to the lab and booking it home on time to reconnect Faith to her IV, I somehow managed to cook a really lavish dinner of omelet and hash browns.  A large, singular omelet.  Take out your parenting notebook and write that little token down under Time Saving Parenting Dinner Advice.  No one gets to pick what his omelet will contain, as everyone gets the same omelet with whatever vegetables happen to be chopped in the fridge (red and yellow peppers) with cheese!  Yum!  Oh, you don't like peppers in your omelet?  Sorrynotsorry.  EAT IT.

The night ended with a failed attempt at molding a plastic mouth piece, two episodes of Full House, and a sassy little sweetheart giving me a run for my money.  I'm afraid to tell you just what a good baby she is, but it's true - she rarely fusses.  Except tonight.  She had the fussing turned up to mega-fuss.  To test me.  To see if I've still got 'it' almost six years out of babydom.  

Turns out, I do.  The rock-bounce-shush combo (and twelve pacifier reinsertions) prove to be just as effective as they were back in 2008.  

And, now, B is on his way home from work, and I'm praying he walks in the door with two scoops of Salted Caramel Brownie from Graeter's.  Momma squeezed pee in a parking lot today and she needs it. 


{PS.  I totally jinxed myself by posting about my non-manic-Monday early this morning over on my teaching blog!  What was I thinking?!  See HERE.}


Erin said...

THIS..made me laugh out epic proportions :)You are a great mom!

Jodi said...

Love it!! The joys of motherhood ;)

Schroeder Shenanigans in 2nd said...

Oh sweet Abby - this made me laugh out loud so many times and I honestly cannot tell you the last time that I've laughed out loud! Thanks so much for a giggle filled post :) I sure hope B delivered with the Graeter's!! :)

Anonymous said...

I just cherish every photo you share of your beautiful children!!! Faith is beautiful beyond words!

Holly said...

Love your genuine-ness! LOL Motherhood...the craziest job you'll ever LOVE!

Unknown said...

Hilarious! As crazy as it is, I can tell you're loving life! Every time I see Faith I just can't believe how adorable she is!!!